Australian writer

Kangaroo on the Tracks

Leave a Comment / Station Stories / By /

Last Monday week while I was going to work, my train suddenly stopped between Brunswick and Jewel two inner suburbs famed for their small streets, crowded houses and coffees.

“We have a kangaroo on the tracks, folks, and we need to stop for it to be removed,” explained the driver.

Just then the two men above walked past my window followed by a little knot of zoo staff carrying clipboards and cloths. One man carried what was obviously a tranquilizer gun and the other was carrying a some kind of technology.

 

We waited and waited and then this little procession came back past us carrying the tranquilized kangaroo in the make shift cloth stretcher.  Talk about being on the spot.  Later Chanel 7 contacted me on Facebook and asked me if I had footage (I didn’t.  Another chance at fame and fortune missed.)

The kangaroo was taken into the local Zoo where sadly it died of stress and earlier injuries later.    Kangaroos occupy the same ecological niche as deer and can be similarly nervous.

This one had already endured a two hour trip to the city in the back of a hay truck a couple of days earlier and been chased by dogs on a nearby oval.  Wildlife spotters had been trying to catch up with the poor frightened creature for a couple of days and finally ran it to ground on a suburban railways track.

 

ARRRGGGHHH!

Leave a Comment / Station Stories / By /

No really.  On behalf of grown up children everywhere who worry about their elderly parents, I have to call this one out.

I was working at the junction the other day. Coming out of the office, I saw a woman in her 70’s in a bike helmet sitting on the concourse floor at the top of the escalators.  She’d fallen.  I helped her 70 + husband lift her up, collect her bicycle and sit her down in the waiting room.  She seemed mercifully unhurt.  But I had to write a report so I asked them what had happened.

Apparently having discovered that there were no trains on their line, they planned to cycle to the station they wanted. So far so good.  But deciding to see if they could take a short cut through the station, they set out to take their bicycles down the escalators to platform 1.

“I forgot to put on my brakes and I lost control of it,” she said.

I was furious.  Visions of broken hips and necks danced in my head. Thank God she herself hadn’t made it onto the escalator when she lost control!  Thank God there was no one else on the escalator at the time!  Didn’t they realize how dangerous it was to take a bike on an escalator? (not the mention against the rules)

I was a paragon of self-control and did not use the word “stupid” as in “Are you two completely stupid?” once. I probably I didn’t need to.  When I suggested politely that next time they use the lifts, they got very defensive.

People disappear

Leave a Comment / Station Stories / By /

About 3 years ago a nice lady regular confided in me that she had stage 2 esophageal cancer. Then I didn’t see her again. Over the years I’ve wondered how she’d fared. I knew she worked at the hospital nearby but I didn’t know her name. So naturally when I asked others among the hospital workers passengers if they knew of her, they were unable to identify her from among the thousands of other workers at the hospital. I came to the melancholy conclusion I would never know how she went or even see her again. Then Hooray! Hooray! she turned up again. She had survived the cancer and was now well enough to go back to work. I’m so glad!! It’s so nice to know what happened to someone and even nicer when the ending is good. And we swapped names. It may not help if she disappears again, but you never know.

Bird Wrangling

Leave a Comment / Station Stories / By /
The limping magpie matriarch

I have added bird wrangler to my list of skills. Recently I spotted one of the local magpies – the limping matriarch I have written about before – climbing into one of the carriages of a halted train with her eye on a squashed biscuit inside. I rushed down the platform yelling at her. I should instead have rushed towards the driver making the stop signal.
The doors closed on us both inside the carriage and a panicked magpie was between me and the emergency button. She yarped and pecked the window and flew up and down the carriage causing people to duck and cover their faces. A generally terrifying time was had by all for the next 2 minutes. The largeness of a magpie and the fierce pointiness of its beak are particularly noticeable in an enclosed space.
When the train pulled up at the next station, everyone pulled open their closest door and after a bit of prompting, the magpie matriarch got out and flew off.
I went back to Zoo station on the next down train after a 15 minute wait and wondered if she’d find her way back.
Great relief when I saw her an hour and a half later, seemly uninjured, limping around the platform looking for biscuit crumbs. Hopefully she will not climb into a train again.

Designer by Train

2 Comments / Station Stories / By /
Complete with Bucket hat

A very odd couple were sitting in the waiting room although I shouldn’t really say that because the man kind enough to explain my blue tooth to me. Also should I perhaps be more humble towards those so pointedly more materially sucessful than me? 
But I shall call it as I see it.  They were both wearing North Face by Gucci outfits complete with the bucket hats pictured above and because they had normal shaped bodies they looked like a pair of shiny gold and tan tents. Between them, they were wearing $14,000 of blingy clobber. I wonder what material that Gucci stuff is made of. It looked rather ungiving.
I’m always startled when I see designer gear at the station. But after all, rich people like animals too and it’s sensible, easy and safe to come to the zoo by train.

Passenger behaving erratically

Leave a Comment / Station Stories / By /

It’s 9 degrees which is cold for Melbourne. The wind is freezing. The trains are running late. When I ask the control room why, they tell me they are waiting for the police to come and collect an erratically behaving passenger at the end station. The passenger has taken off his clothes and is rolling round on the platform. Poor man. Presumably its drugs. Too many of the wrong ones or too few of the right ones.

Tram Boy

Leave a Comment / Station Stories / By /
Tram Boy drove a much more modern tram but I like these old guys best.

Do you remember Tram boy? https://beat.com.au/the-legacy-of-tram-boy-the-15-year-old-who-stole-a-tram-for-a-joyride-around-melbourne/
Tram boy was a 15 year old boy who stole two trams one weekend in 2005 and drove them a total of 25 kms picking up passengers on the way. Apparently he’s a kind of Ned Kelly hero for some people including a young intellectually disabled man who sometime sits with his carer watching the trams.
“Have you heard of me,” he cries. “I’m Tram boy. I stole that Tram and drove it all around. One day I’m going to steal one of your trains too. You tell them. I’m going to steal one of your trains.
You’ll see.”
I guess we will.

The Odd Couple

1 Comment / Station Stories / By /

The woman on Platfrom 2 had clearly never worn a bra and her breasts hung freely, almost down to her navel. She was clearly someone unfettered by femine custom/ limitation. She had short hair, shorts and a t’shirt, all very pale. Calmly she scratched her crotch. What made her stand out even more was her travelling companion. I wasn’t sure if she was friend, family member, social worker, client or girlfriend? What ever their relationship, the companion was wearing full hijab. In the 33 degree heat.
Together the two of them seemed to constitute some kind of metaphor of the extremes of feminity. Or perhaps just the diversity of femine life.

Get Prepared, Woman.

1 Comment / Station Stories / By /

 

Last Friday when horrible Putin made his first moves into Ukraine, I was busy making sure that my regulars, many of whom work weekends, knew our line would be closed that weekend. We always put up signs but people don’t read them and most of them were glad to be reminded/informed.
Except for the grumpy old suitcase/homeless man who usually checks his myki but never actually takes a train. He responded by saying, “Why are you bothering about that? We’re on the verge of WW3. You need to stop worrying about that and get prepared, Woman… etc. etc. etc.”

I guess that told me
(Hope he’s wrong, just bye the bye)

Station Diary

1 Comment / News / By /
This lost dolly was in a tree outside the station all last week.

What was memorable about this last week (apart from the climate change induced humidity) ?

The tough bald headed guy who limped into the station and started telling me how stupidly unhinged everyone was about Covid -19 and how it was just a flu. He was so intent venting his spleen that he almost missed his train. Tee hee! (but I made sure he got on the train because, heck, I didn’t need to hear more of that)

The tiny boy who wanted his parents to stop and see the wonderful poster of men in hard hats fixing the tracks. I was just about the take that poster down so I unlocked the poster case and gave it to him. The memory of his delight at recieiveing an actual official railway poster from an actual really truly railway worker is something that will keep me happy through many a long dark teatime of the soul.