{"id":1169,"date":"2019-06-21T13:56:50","date_gmt":"2019-06-21T03:56:50","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/janeroutley.com\/?p=1169"},"modified":"2019-06-21T13:56:50","modified_gmt":"2019-06-21T03:56:50","slug":"on-delicate-matters-of-etiquette","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/janeroutley.com\/?p=1169","title":{"rendered":"On Delicate Matters of Etiquette"},"content":{"rendered":"<figure id=\"attachment_1174\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-1174\" style=\"width: 700px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/janeroutley.com\/?attachment_id=1174\" rel=\"attachment wp-att-1174\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-1174\" src=\"https:\/\/janeroutley.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/butt-bucket-yellow.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"700\" height=\"525\" srcset=\"https:\/\/janeroutley.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/butt-bucket-yellow.jpg 700w, https:\/\/janeroutley.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/butt-bucket-yellow-300x225.jpg 300w, https:\/\/janeroutley.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/06\/butt-bucket-yellow-400x300.jpg 400w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 700px) 100vw, 700px\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-1174\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Finest Jamestown Butt Bucket<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Outside the station door I have an ice cream container full of sand for people to put cigarette butts in. It cuts down on the mess smokers make. Lately the butts have been disappearing and I&#8217;ve naively been assuming the cleaner is emptying them out. So I am terribly embarrassed to walk out of the station and discover a neatly dressed woman my age, crouched over the butt bucket collecting the butts. I cry &#8220;opps&#8221; as if I\u2019ve interrupted someone doing something shameful, which to my mind I have. But of course that makes it worse because now she knows I\u2019ve noticed. I feel I have created a difficult social situation.<br \/>\nBut the lady isn\u2019t ashamed. She\u2019s about my age and looks like a librarian. Glasses and middle class teeth. Assertively she asks me whose bucket it is and if I could put more sand in so that the cigarettes don\u2019t burn down so much. She even asks me if I will collect them in a little bag for her. This latter is bridge too far ever for a chronic people-pleaser like me. I say no I wouldn\u2019t be comfortable with that. Then we have a little chat about holidays, because she is apparently saving for one. Hence the need to save on smoking.<br \/>\nI presume she will take the butts home and either smoke them or unwrap them and make roll ups out of the left over tobacco. Gah!<br \/>\nI\u2019m startled that someone so middle class looking is collecting butts like this which makes me wonder about; (1) my own socio-economic pre-conceptions and (2) more interestingly what sort of life has brought this woman to doing something usually only the homeless do? Divorce, addiction, mental illness, plain bad luck? Homelessness? Its closer to us all than we think. Station life is full of interesting mysteries and wondering about them keeps me going during the quiet shifts.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Outside the station door I have an ice cream container full of sand for people to put cigarette butts in. It cuts down on the mess smokers make. Lately the butts have been disappearing and I&#8217;ve naively been assuming the cleaner is emptying them out. So I am terribly embarrassed to walk out of the &hellip;<\/p>\n<p class=\"read-more\"> <a class=\"\" href=\"https:\/\/janeroutley.com\/?p=1169\"> <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">On Delicate Matters of Etiquette<\/span> Read More &raquo;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[18],"tags":[96,50,6,17,181,19],"class_list":["post-1169","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stationstories","tag-australian-writer","tag-homelessness","tag-jane-routley","tag-melbourne","tag-smokers","tag-station-stories"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.8 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>On Delicate Matters of Etiquette &#8212; Jane Routley<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/janeroutley.com\/?p=1169\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"On Delicate Matters of Etiquette &#8212; Jane Routley\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Outside the station door I have an ice cream container full of sand for people to put cigarette butts in. It cuts down on the mess smokers make. Lately the butts have been disappearing and I&#8217;ve naively been assuming the cleaner is emptying them out. 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